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17th October 2002,

dear himem,

Why am i bored with you yet want to come back? WHY do i think about you every day? Is it my problem?? Am I strange? I think about you every time i go to the toilet, I even read your specs. for the 50th thime on the toilet! I am obsessed but when i get to you and embrace you i find myself crying, bored nothing to do then i reach for the emp. CD feeling will you crash as i'm about to beat my brother? WHY WHY WHY?

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Dear useless piece of trash.

Im ever so happy today, I was doing my training job on wulfram2, and by complete chance, a player comes up to me asking if Fed2k sounds familiar!! Would you believe it was ixianmace! Course not, your a computer, you don't believe.

Im glad to see atleast 1 player coming from Fed2k to this completely free game that is always active and lots of fun. Why, I might even write an advert for it right now onto my computer (hint hint)

So download the small 23 megs, install the game, and begin learning the steep learning curve.


Thank you computer.

Hope noone else gets any ideas.

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Thoughts: Tuesday, October 22, 2002.

Yeeesss!! I've done it. Today was the last day of school. I can't believe I've actually finished high school!! :D People were going spastic with signatures and well wishes all over each others' shirts, and the Year 12 common room was a complete mess! :O ;D Everyone had cameras and were taking pictures by the minute, there were even people walking around recording stuff on videocameras. Tomorrow will be the school assembly in the hall where the Principle of the school along with the vice principle and the staff and teachers of the school will be seeing us off in a big farewell speech/ceremony. Through all the years that I've been to this school, I must say it's been a hell of a trip to the top. I won't have to sit on the cold hard gymnasium floor and watch people, instead I'll be among the people that are up on the stands while everyone else breaks their bums sitting on the floor for 2 hours!! :D ;D

Then, on Thursday night is the Year 12 formal. Everyone will come in formal dress and have a big dinner, where all the people in senior year will get together and have a big party, along with the teachers and staff members (including the Principle of course, LOL). I look forward to it. The part I'm not looking forward to is the part where the party dies down and we all go home to study for the upcoming exams. Much will be happening over the next few days and weeks, so I'll have little time to do all the things I'd like to do. But for now, I'm happy. :) 8)

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Ahhhh.. Such nostalgia. Make sure you do take pictures etc cos that was one thing I didnt do and have regretted it. Interestingly, I was more interested in the taking of pictures of my teachers than off my fellow mates cos I knew I'd be seeing them but not the teachers.

How wrong I was - I even remember it like it was yesterday and I didnt have a camera at hand because I forgot to get film for it.

So, make sure you do record those last sessions, they're very important.


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Thoughts: Friday, October 25, 2002, 1:15 AM.

Just got back from the formal. That was one hell of a night. Everyone all rowdy and just letting themselves go, while me and my bunch of friends stood by and observed them in a state of interested and amused awe. The girls in their outfits were stunning, they looked very pretty and attractive. :) Cameras were flashing everywhere, the music was so load that I thought my eardrums would explode. The toasts to the teachers and the students from the students and teachers were quite funny, jokes were thrown at individual students here and there about their progress and attitudes during the year. Some people decided to let their mobile phones go off while an important speech was being made, but that did little to sour the occasion in my opinion. By the time the 5 hour event was over, people were crying and saying their final farewells and taking last shots of the people they were unlikely to see ever again in their lives for some time. The atmosphere was amazing, and there were mixed emotions here and there. Some people went to an after party after the formal dinner was over, probably to get smashed and drunk in their celebrations. I'd rather come here and post to let you know what happened, please don't ask me why, the reason is rather simple and logical, but it is best left unsaid. I'm just not sure all of us will see the light of day today as the sun rises, for many lives in previous graduates have been claimed by road accidents due to disorientation from alcohol and plain stupidity.

Nevertheless, I will miss each and every single one of those students from the bottom of my heart*, regardless of whether or not I was friends with them. Farewell to the class of 2002.

*Well ok, there are some I won't miss, but anyway. ;D


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  • 2 weeks later...

Thoughts: Wednesday, November 6, 2002 2:57 PM.

Ok, ok just settle down now. There's no need to get so boiled up over those people that just like being stupid. They're stupid because they're just people, you have to realise that. You thought that they would have more intelligence and maturity did you? Well I guess you've found out that they are just ordinary human beings. People are like that, they are not perfect. You didn't expect them to be, I know, but you didn't expect them to be like that either did you? It never fails to amaze you does it? How one minute you think people could be ok, the next you think they are the most screwed up, pathetic piece of trash that could ever exist. You have not met worse people out there. I do not think you will want to either. You probably, or should I say, almost certaintly, don't know much about the world at your stage. You need more life experience in dealing with people. You are too sensitive. You always say how you'll cope with this and you'll cope with that, but you do not seem to be coping very well at all. People are getting to you. Can't you see that? Anyway, in time, I hope you'll come to be different than the way you are now, I'd really hate it if you let people get to you all the time for the rest of your life. You want to have a heart and feelings, you don't want to be a drone that feels nothing at all right? Enough complaining, it's not going to solve anything. In fact, I don't even know why I'm writing all this down. Maybe I just need to get it out as a way of dealing with stress. Things will be over soon. Nothing lasts forever.

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Looks like an interesting thread.. I'll patricipate with writing down what happens during my days. I'll start with today..

I barely took some time to wake up this morning (went to bed at 04:00am and woke up at 8:00am, cause I've been working on my homepage), cause I knew it would be busy. My new website is finally getting some shape, but I have to do lots of typing for the text that needs to be on there. I started checking my mail and found 11 new e-mails with people who needed help in solving a problem (next to loads of spam). I started off reading and replying to them, which took me quiet a while (despite the fact that a few only had something in the line of "comp locks up, any ideas ?". I get those frequently).

Next was to check the tech forum. IxianMace asked for to be online with MSN to help him with his problem. Before I did that, I needed to retreive a CD (Def Leppard) that they left in my old cd player from my car (old one was broken, so they needed to replace it). A distance of 15km almost took me an hour, due to traffic jams. Almost had an accident (not my fault), but made it safely back.

As soon as I was back, I got online and started helping out IxianMace with his problem and guided him through. When done, it's almost the end of the day. Now my daughter is asking my attention, cause she want's to play soccer with me and I can't resist those cute eyes :).. wait..heck, I needed to work on my homepage. Guess it'll have to wait for tomorrow, or maybe later tonight (probably I'll see my bed again at around 4:00am, *sigh*).

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Dear crappy school computer

I'm now forced to go on the 'net here at school because of BTinternet saying we can only have 150 hours a week. I'm studying for my A-levels so I have to much homework and some coursework. And we were supposed to be doing exams at Air Cadets but they got posponed as the officer didn't turn up so we had to study for somthing we probably won't be doing till March if ever.

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Thoughts: Saturday, November 16th, 2002.

Woohoo!! I just downloaded my favourite song off Caid Ivik's site!! I never thought I'd hear it again. I can't believe I actually have it now. Yes, that sound is so familiar. The song is so old but I still love it!! 8) Ok, now I wonder if I could find the video clip somewhere, I still remember how it looked... :)

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Dear Wyona

I just held off a germany and a italy as russia for 3 hours in starcraft ww2. with no allies. I ussaly suck as russia i scared myself holding them off that long...well the norwegions helped but...ya know they are comp and all...

is there anyone who can beat me in diplomacy? i am like god in that my name is etched on walls to commerate my greatness and god like skills....if only i had a worth oponite to crush between my ottoman fingers...if only...if only....

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Dear my comp named Wyona.

Another victory for the Ottoman empire! My ottoman empire record is 34-23-2 which was alot better than it was a week or two ago.

My italy record is 14-6-1 which is better but i still like fighting for sullyman better than ceaser.

Basicly what happend was in this match. There were Me (ottoman empire Sullyman! Malmuckes(Ordos 45) A austria, a Sweeden and a finland and a spain. I was allyed to everyone except Spain. The only place i could expand at first was in Crimea and southern russia becouse i couldnt expand into africa becouse o45 was doing that and i couldnt expand much into europe becouse Austria was doing that.

Welll after taking over Crimea and Ukraian. The first conflicts between spanish forces and Austrian forces in the Neatherlands and in luxenburg begain. I being the good ally that I am. Rushed over as many of my Turkish Rifil men as i could(Crappy health,decent shot but when u build one you get two.) Held the luxemburg enterence. While he bunked up holland.

Some of my other forces were Taking isles in the mederterianen.

Sicily fell to me, Crete,Cyprus,That one french isle beside italy....Corsica fell to me. And from Sicily i launched a invasion of italy.

The comp fell easily and i reached the northern parts of italy before running into trouble. The Spainish were sending in french forign legion troops to clear out italy and open another front into austria!!!!

My forces faught vailienty but were nearly overwlemed by sheer numbers and the tenacity of how the french faught.

Austrian forces finaly broke into italy and helped me beat them back to the spainish French border,

He Rolled dozens of elite austrian tanks into spain and crushed it with out mercy.

However O45 and spain had a non agression pact. Giving him permision to cross through His land and atack turkey!

I was unable to stop this...and most of turkey fell. We faught vailienty but we just couldnt hold them.

Austiran tanks marched through crimea and helped me out as i had helped them out, We drove those vial spainish dogs out of turkey.

He sent wave after wave. We held. Norway who now had russia. Had built a large defenesve wall of suply depots stoping any relive forces from getting to me. He was a ally of spain and of me. Well we convinced him to let austrian tanks in and we beat them back.

Austiran elite tanks performed a drop in his base in algriea. Destroying nearly everything.

Spain quit the game in defeat. A long process of bordom and military build continued. Ottoman forces built a wall in crimea to keep out the Norwegion forces. This strained relations with norway.

They decleared war on September 19th 1678. My wall was crushed on the northern front. My forces near selvesapol held on, destroying wave after wave of sweedish lancers(Zelots) While my military in crimea held off a massive Norwegion atack.

I asked Austria for permission to let my forces in the balkins cross his terroritory to help my forces in the east.

He declined. So i had to build dropships to ferry my forces over.

While i was building some dropships. I had built 4 barackes and 3 war factories in poland, and was pumping out turkish rifilmen and tanks as fast as i could. My forces in crimea laucnhed a offensive and drove him out of ukraina. Destroying 6 norwegion barackes. and reaching the point in which the original ottoman wall stood.

I had about 10 dropships with two tanks each ready for suport.

My 20 tanks flew over to my production lines to drop them off, when a idea struck me. If norway is having all his forces fight me down here what dose he have to defend his homeland?

So my dropships flew over warsaw and towards Sweeden taking only a few shots from norwegion flak, they droped the tanks off and flew back for the next load of tanks. The tanks marched almost unchekced through the south of sweeden and two the capital. When i first droped sweeden had sent nearly all his forces back to his homeland to defeat my drop.

My tanks soon died.

But while they were being killed. My Poilsh turkish infantry divsions blew through the wall and marched towards moscow.

The Ukriania infantry and tank diviosions also blew through the wall and begian a atack on moscow.

Moscow was a heavy troops point for the Sweedish forces. While 9 barackes were being destroyed, they pumped out many many danish rifilmen,Sweedish lancers, and elite russian infantry. They were ovlerwelmed by sheer numbers, Moscow fell into ottoman hands. Millions rejoiced. This was the turning point in the war against sweeden whare we drove them back, and stoped being drove back!

My polish forces begin seiging "Fortress finland" three bunkers and protos photo cannons stood in defince of ottoman forces.

MY first seige failed destroyring the cannons and the bunerks but not doing any damage to the 6 to 9 barackes that continued to pump out forces.

While this was happening my forces were flanking him from the east, he had no defensive troops in east russia, finlands flank was completly open. My Scvs begain building 11 barackes to produce a massive amout of turkish rifil men.

This however was not needed as a ottoman rifil men finaly broke through the finish line and begin pushing them back towards norway.

O45 forces who had a full alience had sent forces to take the untaken "Siberiea" His real intentions were to get as close to the sweedish forces, declar war on him and not alow any forces from finland to retreat into norway.

This also was not needed as the norwegion was qouted to say "This is gay" And admited his defeat by leaving the game.

Another vicotry for exatreides and the ottoman empire!

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  • 2 weeks later...

Thoughts: Saturday, November 30, 2002. 9:36 PM

Hmmm, ok. Unit types. Turret types. Bullet types. Warhead types. Atreides Laser Mech. Atreides Laser Mech gun. LasMech_B. LasMech_W. Ok, where is tlinflyer? Right, ok here go the unit stats. Ok. Cost, 950, build time, 700. Right. 10, 20, 30. Extra damage. Extra armour. Extra health. Ok now what next? Unit types. Turret types. Bullet types. Warhead types. Burnt. Yeah ok. Atreides Laser Mech. Atreides Siege turret. Siege turret gun. Etc, etc. Ok let's test it. Yes. Yes. Bla bla bla.

"This program has performed an illegal operation and will be shut down. Contact the program vendor if the problem persists".

*SIGH* Ok here we go again...

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I started my new job last week. I already worked for the company before and was curious to see how things were and how people would react on me being back. As soonas I entered the floor, a lot of people were surprised to see me back, but also happy and excited. Some quotes:

You're back ? I thought someone was telling me a bad joke ! Welcome back !!

Now that you're back, things are finally going to be good

Excellent that you're back, now we will have our geeat support documents !!

We missed you

There are more, but it's just to show that it was good to be back. The company I work for (a major English comapny) has a backbone network in Europe. Starting the beginning of next year, they are going to have a world wide backbone network. A backbone network is a network where ISP's connect to to get their clients on the internet. But it's also used by multinationals to give the a connection to there several offices all over the world. They ask me to work for them again to train new people for their role to maintain and monitor that network. Also I need to make preparations (sp?) to have our European network join into the world wide one. Yesterday I also heard that I'm going to be responsible for a huge customer (with huge I mean a multi billion contract) and make sure he stays happy.

The first couple of days there I've been busy trying to get my access and accounts setup to do the job. I created some documents for people to learn from and explain about the stuff they are working on. Had some social talks (very improtant to have contacts in the right places ;)). Some problems occured on the network, which were easy to solve. So as you can see all is fine and I'm pretty busy, but it leads to me not having had the time to update my website again *sigh*..

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*sigh*, I'm currently creating traning documents, but it's damn hard to keep things simplified if you're an expert on things. Especially if you're used to abbreviations *huge sigh*. I only handled one item (out of 14) and already have a document of 15 pages. All I have to hope for now is that things ain't boring if I need to explain them...

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I had a pretty bad day yesterday, i broke down and cried in the middle of class. just really scared. my birthday is in thursday and that is cool but lately its just been hard emotionally. dont want to talk about it all. just blah. woke up really early for college so I am really tired. talk to you later computer


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