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I should be happy, but I'm not

Dante

By Dante
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Dante

Dante

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Posted

I just got back from having the time of my life in Canada, skiing in the Rockies. Great fun. This should make me happy, I've just had a really great experience. But I'm not. Why? Here's the details...

A few years ago I met a guy that I really had a crush on (For those of you who don't know, I'm gay. If you don't like that then you don't have to read on). He didn't stick around for long but a few months ago he turned up again, and I was attracted more than ever. The first guy I asked out hated me forever more, and I was terrified of trying again with this one. But I did, after weeks of deliberation I gave him a note telling him, and a way to get in contact with me. My e-mail address. He didn't try, and left again soon after. I tried asking his sister, who is friends with mine, and got very little detail other than he read the note.

This was nasty enough. He could at least have SPOKEN TO ME! But that's not the point. It's his 18th birthday soon, and the party will be mega. It will be huge. Massive. I wasn't really expecting an invite as I'm pretty sure he wants nothing to do with me now. This is what pissed me off, what really, REALLY angered me... HE INVITED MY SISTER! MY DAMN SISTER! HE HARDLY KNOWS HER! HASN'T SEEN HER FOR MONTHS! It's not that I didn't get an invite, it's that SHE DID! Grrrrrr......... It's put a real black cloud over my day....week........month..........

Ahh well... Rant over. I don't do this too often and it really makes me feel better. Sorry to shout my problems at you, I needed that.

Dante

Dante

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Well if you asked him out and he is straight it might have freaked him out a little.

I'm guessing that's what happened. *Grumble grumble* It's not like anything else has ever happened when I try to ask someone out... *grumble grumble*

DjCiD

DjCiD

Posted
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Cheers mate, don't let it get you down.

Guys can be harder to deal with than the ladies at times. {For those that don't know I use to play for both teams, until I settled down and got hitched. If that offends you and you don't reply to my post anymore then thats your fault you wont see me losing any sleep over it}

I remember once I was going to a place called Time Out it was for Gay, Bi and Trans-gender youth, and I met a really cute guy there. First nite I met him he was doing a skit in Drag so that set off all the bells and whistles and I thought to myself I really wanted to meet the guy. I had failed attempts left and right of trying to get to know him better, maybe I was just too shy at the time. What also made it difficult was that his friends and mine were in two different clicks, a you know the only thing worse than snotty stuck you bratty girls is snotty stuck up bratty gay guys ;) No one ever wanted to hang out together because so-n-so is friends with so-n-so and he used to date him and blah blah blah... Finally after a few months I did get to talk to him and hang out and get to know more about him, only to find out up he was already seeing someone. What really chafed my balls was that during the months of click bashing trying to get to see him someone could have at least told me... but hey I made a few new friends in the process and got to see him in drag a few more times too so that made up for it.

DjCiD

DjCiD

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Posted

My bad I was under the assumption you already new he was gay and out about it. I've lost a few friends and turned other would be friends off from just talking about it. It may have freaked him out, but still wasn't very nice of him to not at least give you the decency of telling you. If I was your sister I wouldn't go because the guy acted like an ass by inviting her and not you. Then again you and your sister could always crash his party. ;D

what was that Monty Python song... " Always look on the bright side of life *whistles* "

ken124578

ken124578

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A few years ago I met a guy that I really had a crush on (For those of you who don't know, I'm gay. If you don't like that then you don't have to read on).

I don't have a problem against gay people, though, as long as you don't want to get 'pozzed' since that is just disgusting :O

SurlyPIG

SurlyPIG

Posted
Posted

Well if you asked him out and he is straight it might have freaked him out a little.

I'm guessing that's what happened. *Grumble grumble* It's not like anything else has ever happened when I try to ask someone out... *grumble grumble*
That's got to be it. I think he should have at the very least talked to you even regardless of his preference and probably still invited you to his party...It's not a very fair thing to practice but as a gay guy in a homophobic world it's probably best to find out the sexuality of those you're interested in before you pursue anything with them. :- I feel kinda lousy for saying that but it's generally the way society is...

EDIT : BTW, where did you ski?

Mahdi

Mahdi

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Well, if he used to know your sister, but was never friends with you, and he's having a huge mega-party is it really all that surprising that she got an invite? I doubt it's so much he pusposly excluded you as it is that he invited someone who he used to be friends with, and since he was never friends with you, he never invited you.

And if your letter did have anything to do with it, it's probably that he isn't comfortable around you, and it is his birthday party. If someone you had no interest in whatsoever and arn't friends with sent you a love note, would you really want to invite him/her to your birthday party?

Timenn

Timenn

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I don't think you can say he is an asshole because he did not reply.

The way people react on such things are often weird. It isn't only with homosexuality. Also with hetero. You see, when you meet someone and you both have alot of fun together, and you fall in love, it is the question if the other one happened the same, but if he/she only saw you as a good friend, then he/she will be quite offended when you tell your feelings. For that person it is like a friendship has been broken because you are not a friend in his/her eyes anymore but a lover.

That's my view. He might be offended (not in the way that he is sees you as an 'attacker' but he is just shocked by it) And I don't think he hates you now, I think you should try to have a good talk with him.

Dante

Dante

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I can understand that he's not comfortable. Heck, so has everyone else I've tried (It's not that I don't check first, but people around here REALLY don't about this kinda thing much). He probably wants to put the whole thing behind him and if that's how it is that's how it is. Like I said, it's not so much that I (friend of some time, but recently freaked out by me) didn't get an invite. It's that she (loudmouthed sister of me who never spent much time with him) did get one.

Fact is, he's never been close to my sister. There's an age gap of 4 years so they never met in school and would never have done so out of school if it hadn't been for me. She certainly has no feelings for him. Still, there's nothing I can do. We'll both be attending a wedding at the other end of England when the party comes. Thanks for all the support guys.

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