A parent's choice?

[Acriku]

When you have your first child, for those who are not yet fathers, will you immediately push your religion onto the child when s/he is young enough? Or will you teach it toleration, and teach him/her many different beliefs of the world, and allow him/her to reach her/his own conclusion?

For myself, I would to the latter. Looking back, I would rather have my parents letting me choose my beliefs, rather than being brainwashed (which is what children are being done with anything that they cannot understand but are demanded to believe it, like Santa).

If you already have a child(ren), then by all means tell us what you did do :)

[Scrinlord]

I am going to teach my child tolerance and compassion, but I am also going to take the child to church with me. I will not try to force religion onto the child, but he/she will obviously be influenced by my religion.

But teaching my kids religion might be hard, because the girl I love and I are of different religions(I am Christian she is mormon)

[Anathema]

My parents were atheists, but they never really pushed me into it. They were once christians themselves.

[stefanhendriks]

So are my parents, and they never pushed me into any kind of direction.

I feel everybody may have its own religion, and believe whatever they want to believe. But do not try to convince me in stuff i do not believe in, i can get quite irritated by that.

(like some people do, come at your door and they want to convince you into a sort of religion)

[Dante]

My mother deliberately steered me away from religion but left the choice open as to whether I wanted to believe or not. As in, "We have never gone to church and I'm not going to go to church but you can go to church if you want." I'm glad she did that, it taught me to look at thngs with a slightly broader perspective.

If I ever adopt a child I'll tell them everything I know about ALL religions and let them decide. But they will recieve no encouragement, nor distain. I will try to remain completely impartial.

[stefanhendriks]

I think that when you offer religions, its like a commercial offering several products and you let someone pick one. With religions, i would let my child (i don't have one btw) choose to believe in what religion it wants, but i will not go and talk broadly all about several religions, because i simply do not know every religion by hearth and not 100%.

Whenever my kid is interested in a religion, he should find information about it or ask about it. Its more like, going into the direction where you are interested in, rather then saying there are only a few options.

kinda hard to explain, i hope you get my point?

[IxianMace]

When you have your first child, for those who are not yet fathers, will you immediately push your religion onto the child when s/he is young enough? Or will you teach it toleration, and teach him/her many different beliefs of the world, and allow him/her to reach her/his own conclusion?

I'm very unlikely to have a child due to various reasons, but if I did, I would not teach him/her anything to do with religion. I would let him/her believe what he/she wants to believe, and not believe what he/she doesn't want to believe.

[stefanhendriks]

In fact, i don't know if i ever will be father aswell. But lets just hope it will ever be so... as my parents always say:

"you don't take children, you get them".

[Dante]

Or in some countries buy them. :)

Sorry, I couldn't resist...

[IxianMace]

"you don't take children, you get them".

Maybe I'm just stupid, but could you explain what that means? ???

Or in some countries buy them. :)

Sorry, I couldn't resist...

Err, the fact that you posted that with a happy smiley face at the end makes it all the more creepier... :O

But yes, you are probably right. Although I haven't heard much about this sort of practice, I think that there is a good chance that people are sold as merchandise somewhere in the world. It's dispicable.

[Inoculator9]

I would probably go into it slowly, but answer any questions that might have at any age. I'm an atheist, but I have some Buddhist background so tolerance of other religions nad their practices would no doubt included.

[Dante]

Good chance nothing. It's almost legal in some countries. And I think it really is in some others... :)

(HAPPY SMILEY! HAPPY SMILEY! :D )

[Edric O]

I will not have children, so the question is moot. :)

As for myself, I've been an atheist for all my childhood, and converted to Christianity a short while before my early teens.

[Anathema]

How did your parents think about that?

[nemafakei]

Were I to have children (I'm not intending to...), I would educate them about religion, but emphasize the importance of morality far more. If they were to show an interest in a religion, I would not quarrel, once they were old enough to for reason (age depends on the child).

[Edric O]

Earthnuker, my parents always gave me complete freedom of religion. They themselves are non-practicing Christians, but they never tried to persuade me to believe or dis-believe anything. They didn't mind me being an atheist, even though I was one for quite a long time. Later I converted to Christianity entirely of my own accord, and it was actually a few months before I eventually told them about it.

[gryphon]

I myself was raised by my mother as a Catholic, fist school also was a Catholic school in my neigbourhood. Didn't help though. . .don't think I have any religion at this point. Have some preferences from some religions, just not one I consider myslef a follower of. When I get Children of my own I won't enforce, offer or raise them in any way related to any religion. Although some various aspects I will teatch [ or try to ] them. If they should deside to join any religion they are free to do so .. given they are at an age they can deside for themselfs.

[stefanhendriks]

"you do not take children, you get them"

What is meant, is that people often assume they can 'take' (get) children. But, that is not the case. You cannot always take children, in the biological sense. People often assume there are no problems with getting children that way.

Thats why you do not 'take' children (rough translation from dutch->englisch), but you 'get' them. If you have the luck to have a child in the normal biological way ('luck' is a big word in this sentence) you get them.

[Inoculator9]

My mom was an astrologer, my dad was a "zen-atheist" (lol), my dad's parents are methodist, and my mom's entire family is Jewish, so I had plenty to choose from. I think my family actually approved of me becoming an atheist. It's a situation I hope that my children would not have to deal with. Religious confusion can cause a lot of harm.

[SurlyPIG]

Yeah, it certainly can, especially at early ages. If they're confused about religion at an early age and they are swayed in one direction they may feel like they'd been lied to when they get a little older.

I would teach morality, not religion. Should my kids want to join any religion, that would be entirely their decision. I would try to give them a bit of background info about the major religions, though, just so they can make an informed decision.

[Gobalopper]

Actually I've seen a lot of kids who have grown up in a religious household throw it away when they get older.

If anything you should teach your children good moral values but if you yourself are religious I don't see any problems with teaching your child the things you have learnt. If you can't trust your own values/religion to your children then I don't think you truly believe them yourself.

[Elite47]

Unless a child specifically needs your input on an issue that plays a role in who they become, you shouldn't give it. Children have a lot to learn, so you shouldn't influence their beliefs. They might not learn the truth(their own truth; their true belief) until it is too late.

If u believe in something, you should believe because you truly do. Not because you were swayed to believe in something before you even knew what it was.

If i ever have a kid, i will teach morals. I won't even speak of religions until their is a reason to do so. Morals make u strong by developing your charactor. religions make u weak because u try to explain something that actually CAN'T be explained; u can't solve the unsolvable.

[TMA_1]

I have to agree with jesse on this point.

When a child is taught religion at an early age, it usually leads to resentment and bitter feelings towards the parents. That is why many kids go atheist. They get tired of having to obey their parent's orders and try to break away from conformity. Parents should be examples more than teachers in this area. My dad was a minister and devout christian, but I was never forced to study or believe, I saw his example and followed it, and then found myself to know the Lord.

I am surprised how many people dont want to have children on this board. Geesh, I love kids and want to have them, and I have had to take care of them a lot! I even like the annoying crap they can do.lol Like I said though, I would teach by example, but never force the issue of a relationship with God.

[Elite47]

If you can't trust your own values/religion to your children then I don't think you truly believe them yourself.

As i said in another thread, u r an individual and so is your child. U may trust your religion or values as much as u like(you made that choice for your individual self), but who says ur children will feel the same? Don't they also deserve to be able to make their own individual choice without persuation?

[Gobalopper]

I didn't say force them on your children, I said teach your children.