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Survey: Why did the chicken cross the road?

Edric O

By Edric O
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DjCiD

DjCiD

Posted
Posted

CiD: If a chicken crosses a road and no is there to see it... did it really cross the road?

and so i must ask another one...

Which came first the chicken or the egg?

three minuets later as the egg lights up a smoke the disgrunteled chicken replys

"well now we know the answer to that question"

(must have a dirtly little mind for that one to be funny)

i'll check back tomorrow to see who still hasnt got it ;D

Acriku

Acriku

Posted
Posted

Hehehe good one CiD - took me a few seconds to get that one ;) Nice to have a good laugh after long day at work.

Generic Mobster: If he crosses the road again, without the proper payments, there will be horse's heads to pay.

Generic Gobist: Becauseth almighty Gob hath commanded thee so!

Acriku

Acriku

Posted
Posted

The egg came first because

1) No one has ever specified if it was a chicken egg or not - so reptile eggs have been here long before any chicken eggs have :)

2) For a previous bird to evolve into the chicken, the genetic mutations would take place as the process takes place, so it would have to be the egg. The semi-not-yet-evolved-into-a-chicken birds would have laid eggs with mutations until the chicken we now know it as is hatched, and so on continues the evolutionary standpoint.

For further explanation, and in the most lamen's terms I've written probably:

Ok, you have a semi-not-yet-evolved-into-a-chicken bird, that is not quite a chicken but not quite not a chicken. It's playing around in the ground, until *oops* it's hatching an egg. And out pops a chicken!

DjCiD

DjCiD

Posted
Posted

That joke makes no sense. The chicken came first, any one with half a brain knows that.

i guess your Get Some Factor really has decreased ::) you'll never live that post down :P I bet its in the Dungeon ;D

TMA_1

TMA_1

Posted
Posted

lol cid... that took me like a few seconds. So was the egg nice enough to come after the chicken? ... lol sorry that was dirty.lol oops ;)

jacobdouds

jacobdouds

Posted
Posted

You were thinking about it for an entire day?

The Gobism Religion: The great server of Gob was many internet highways away, the chicken, the lower being of Gobism, had to cross the roads in order to obtain erfection in Gobs eye.

DjCiD

DjCiD

Posted
Posted

has it been a day already?! must buy watch ;D

yes the egg came first, lit up a smoke and left the chicken a lil underdone :P ;D

Lord J

Lord J

Posted
Posted

Yep...You guys are absolutely sick...Anyway, here are some Highlander Chicken/Road jokes:

Duncan Macleod: It was tryng to get away from Amanda's cooking.

Methos: I gave up feeling guilty about the chicken in the 11th century.

Richie: I'm sorry Mac, I know the chicken was your friend.

Connor Macleod: The chicken is a stupid haggis.

Joe: Tradition. You gotta love it.

Horton: Yes, I killed the chicken as he crossed the road, but he was an abomination that didn t deserve to live. Besides, I was hungry.

Amanda There was something he wanted to borrow on the other side.

Rachel Macleod: A chicken of honor lives with what he does.

Darius: He was in search of enlightenment.

Loreena McKennitt: The long boats from Antrim came to float it away.

F. Braun McAsh: We've got this really great chicken scene set up. First, we had to coat the road with coca-cola so it was sticky......

All courtesy of http://tmar.za.net/trek/chick2.htm

Lord J

Lord J

Posted
Posted

Yep, if you ever want to have a little fun, watch a scifi/kung fu movie or TV show, and listen to Queen while watching two guys go at each other with broadswords in the middle of modern-day New York, Highlander is just about your best choice.

ordos45

ordos45

Posted
Posted

From Stargate SG-1:

O'Niel: For crying out loud, I don't trust the chicken to tell us the truth of why it crossed the road! That chicken is just like the Tok'ra!

Carter: Well the chicken crossing the road is our earliest reference to the wormhole created by the Stargate, as humans are the chicken and the road is a wormhole to other worlds......

Doctor Frasier: Its obvious the chicken couldn't have survived the massive impact injuries from cars hitting it while it attempted to cross the road.

General Hammond: The President gave it authority to.

Teal'C: O'Neil, what is a chicken?

Daniel: I think it laid an egg on an artifact and felt guilty.

Maybourne: The chicken was working for me, and it has blackmail on all of you!

Apophis: To bow to me, its mighty God!

Acriku

Acriku

Posted
Posted

Holy Grail reasons:

King Arthur: For the quest of the Holy Egg!

Patsy: *clappity clap*

Sir Benevere: Well, if were to build a large wooden chicken....*thwap*

Sir Lancelot: To fight the tyrants! On the other side!

The French: That yellow-bellied feather-plucked no-lipped son of a silly person!!

Sir Robin: What? Where's a chicken?! *runs away*

Knights who say Ni: To chop down the mightiest tree wiiiiith....A HERRING!

Razorox

Razorox

Posted
Posted

CiD: If a chicken crosses a road and no is there to see it... did it really cross the road?

and so i must ask another one...

Which came first the chicken or the egg?

three minuets later as the egg lights up a smoke the disgrunteled chicken replys

"well now we know the answer to that question"

(must have a dirtly little mind for that one to be funny)

i'll check back tomorrow to see who still hasnt got it ;D

I don't get it...seriously. I guess my mind isn't dirty enough ;D

DjCiD

DjCiD

Posted
Posted

got this from [iP] elite pimps website

http://www.warmaker.com/content/humour/humour003.shtml

How Chickens Cross Roads

Humour | 20.10.01

NT Chicken:

Will cross the road in June. No, August. September for sure.

OS/2 Chicken:

It crossed the road in style years ago, but it was so quiet that nobody noticed.

Win 95 Chicken:

You see different colored feathers while it crosses, but cook it and it still tastes like ... chicken.

Microsoft Chicken :

It's already on both sides of the road. And it just bought the road.

Lotus Chicken:

Don't you *dare* try to cross the road the same way we do!

OOP Chicken:

It doesn't need to cross the road, it just sends a message.

Assembler Chicken:

First it builds the road ...

C Chicken:

It crosses the road without looking both ways.

C++ Chicken:

The chicken wouldn't have to cross the road, you'd simply refer to him on the other side.

VB Chicken:

USHighways!TheRoad.cross (aChicken)

Delphi Chicken:

The chicken is dragged across the road and dropped on the other side.

Java Chicken:

If your road needs to be crossed by a chicken, the server will download one to the other side. (Of course, those are chicklets.)

Web Chicken:

Jumps out onto the road, turns right, and just keeps on running.

Gopher Chicken:

Tried to run, but got flattened by the Web chicken.

COBOL Chicken:

0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING. IF NO-MORE-VEHICLES THEN PERFORM

0010-CROSS-THE-ROAD VARYING STEPS FROM 1 BY 1 UNTIL ON-THE-OTHER-SIDE

ELSE GO TO 0001-CHICKEN-CROSSING

Object-relational database Chicken:

Creates a copy of the chicken which you can cook without damaging the original chicken until you try to send it back across the road, whereupon the original chicken is destroyed.

Newton Chicken:

Can't cluck, can't fly, and can't lay eggs, but you can carry it across the road in your pocket!

Mac Chicken:

No reasonable chicken owner would want a chicken to cross the road, so there's no way to tell it to.

Cray Chicken:

Crosses faster than any other chicken, but if you don't dip it in liquid nitrogen first, it arrives on the other side fully cooked.

Quantum Logic Chicken:

The chicken is distributed probabalistically on all sides of the road until you observe it on the side of your choice.

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