Predictions for the last two "Heroes" books

[SandChigger]

We've been amusing ourselves over at Jacurutu with speculation about what nonsense might show up in the final two "Heroes" books, The Throne of Dune and Leto (or The Golden Path?) of Dune. I'm collecting the "predictions" on two pages on HToD:

http://www.hairyticksofdune.net/synopses/pre_tod.html

http://www.hairyticksofdune.net/synopses/pre_lod.html

If you have any intelligent or amusing ideas, post them here, PM or email me. SPOILING the books before they are even written is the object. :D

[athanasios]

You forgot to mention about George Bush (A Titan?). Maybe reappears from another dimension where he was lost due to his 'high' IQ and leads an army of machines to conquer Arrakis. If they used the name of Shaddam why not this one's too.  :P ;D :D

[SandChigger]

Sorry, I was a bit inattentive when wording the last bit of the above and may have given some people the wrong idea.

I think I've fixed the problem. :)

[ErasOmnius]

Throne --

Prequel Part. [The Life of Muad'Dib, Part 1.5]

1. Another young Ecaz daughter is found, and once again, House Atreides is chosen to marry her [a sure sign that she will be dead in 2 chapters]. Our [journeyman, everywhere-at-once, assassin, Spice Manager, Emperor killing, Adopted Father of Marie-the-Future-Semi-Kwisatz person extraordinaire] Hasimir Fenring, is sent by Shaddam to kill her. Shaddam cannot allow an Ecaz-Atrides union. Irulan goes with him to attend the wedding.

Irulan hits her head and brings on permanent amnesia, as Hasimir kills the Ecaz heiress, while Paul is out of the room. Paul vows vengence on whom-ever has done this to his fiance'. Hasimir reports to Shaddam, Paul's vow of retribution, and Shaddam decides that House Atrides must go, and concocts the DUNE plot.

Between Winds and Children [The Life of Muad'Dib, Parts 3.5 and 5] --

Flash forward to Shaddam's ghola attack during the early part of the Regency. Shaddam attacks with his ghola army, and thinks himself victorius, with Hasimir as his aide. Irulan is ready to support her father, and hits her head again, and remembers her dad is evil, and goes to Alia's side.

Shaddam and Hasimir comes across the Preacher in the Desert, and they have a true two against one. Paul stabs Shaddam, bathing in his blood, remembering his father. Hasimir is amazed that the Preacher spares his life, and sentences Hasimir to live...

Golden Path [The Life of Muad'Dib's Son, Parts 2 and 4]--

1. Leto II will order a ghola of Vladimir, and instruct the Tleilaxu to tamper with it, to induce Alia's personality into it. This will explain the Hunters/Sandworms ghola having Alia as an Abomination. Leto will say, "This is fair play...because the ghostly abomination of Vladimir tortured my Aunt."

2. Just as in Winds of Dune, the people of Caladan revolt when Leto II orders its' name shortened to Dan. This time, however, the Atreides Emperor does not give in.

[athanasios]

... what nonsense might show up...

If you have any intelligent or amusing ideas

You contradict yourself. :P

Besides all stuff posted there is quite boring to read.

But in the tons of garbage posted there there maybe something that accidentally will mimic content of the books and I am sure that then you will sue BH and KJA for copyright infringements. ::) :-[

[SandChigger]

Thanks for playing, ErasOmnius! I'll work some of that in and credit you. :)

Besides all stuff posted there is quite boring to read.

Well then, sugar, JUST DON'T READ IT! Isn't that what you Preeks (=McDune fans) say?

<img src="http://www.hairyticksofdune.net/extimgs/rolling.gif" />

Edit to add: Oh yeah, almost forgot: TheKJA Twitted on June 6 about it being about time to start "mull[ing] over ideas" for the next McDune book. Not a moment too late! :D

[MrFlibble]

Just my opinion, but I can't get off that feeling that, while the current endeavour is aimed at mocking KJA and his "creative writing", it somehow also touches Frank's legacy, in a bad way :( Once, I started writing a mockery/parody "abstract" from a KJA-like Dune book, it was funny for a couple of minutes, but then it became creepy. KJA already had smeared the name of Dune enough IMO :(

[SandChigger]

Just my opinion, but I can't get off that feeling that, while the current endeavour is aimed at mocking KJA and his "creative writing", it somehow also touches Frank's legacy, in a bad way :(

Hmm. I'm not sure I get how... ??

[athanasios]

...

Agree.

Wouldn't it be more constructive to start writing something in the spirit of FH Dune?

[MrFlibble]

Hmm. I'm not sure I get how... ??

Dunno, I just had that impression :) Perhaps because any mockery of KJA's books indirectly promotes them (as an anti-advertisement of sorts), instead of committing them to the utter oblivion they deserve.

[SandChigger]

Well, I understand that argument, but we've seen how well trying to simply ignore stupidity and ignorance and bigotry has worked on this very board in the last few days, now haven't we? ;)

[MrFlibble]

Yeah, you're right...

[Eliyyahu]

All of the original novels were just Norma Cenva dreaming.

[ErasOmnius]

Well, I understand that argument, but we've seen how well trying to simply ignore stupidity and ignorance and bigotry has worked on this very board in the last few days, now haven't we? ;)

Do you think I am a bigot?

[SandChigger]

All of the original novels were just Norma Cenva dreaming.

LOL. Unfortunately, though, they've already made them all in-universe texts written by Irulan (at least the first three) or, eventually, some other writer. (I'm rooting for Gaus Andaud for the last three.)

[SandChigger]

It looks like this series is going to be axed, or at the very least tabled indefinitely, halfway through, in the near future...

[Dunenewt]

What makes you say that?

[Dante]

Optimism?

[athanasios]

Perversion?

[ErasOmnius]

It looks like this series is going to be axed, or at the very least tabled indefinitely, halfway through, in the near future...

Soon, a slight shifting on the DuneNovels web page:

And don't forget to purchase the duology known as Paul of Dune and Winds of Dune.

Please take 5 years off KJA & BH!

[SandChigger]

Probably quicker if you read for yourselves. (Well, most of you, that is.)

http://chiggerblog.hairyticksofdune.net/blog/?p=885

[arnoldo]

One prediction could be that the last two books are never published. . . however in the year 2050 the outlines for these books are discovered in a safety deposit box.  Once published, these books will generate a great deal of controvery and someone will feel inspired to start a blog about it.  :P

[SandChigger]

One prediction could be that the last two books are never published. . . however in the year 2050 the outlines for these books are discovered in a safety deposit box.  Once published, these books will generate a great deal of controvery and someone will feel inspired to start a blog about it.   :P

Controvery?

Anyway, this was for predictions about IN-universe events, not meta-level/Real-World shtuff.

But really, arnoldo, as much as you lurk around my website and Jacurutu, you should realize by now that there's more than just a blog. Added <a href="http://resources.hairyticksofdune.net/fremen.php">a new page on Fremen and Arabic</a> just yesterday, as a matter of fact. :)

(Oh, and btw, in the Duniverse, Chakobsa only bears a surface similarity to Serbian or Slovenian or Romany in a few utterances. At a meta-level, of course, FH just took some words & sentences from a few language text[book]s and applied his own meanings to them.)

Edit: The relevance of that last is I'll be adding a page on Chakobsa soon, too. :)

[arnoldo]

Controvery?

Anyway, this was for predictions about IN-universe events, not meta-level/Real-World shtuff.

But really, arnoldo, as much as you lurk around my website and Jacurutu, you should realize by now that there's more than just a blog. Added <a href="http://resources.hairyticksofdune.net/fremen.php">a new page on Fremen and Arabic</a> just yesterday, as a matter of fact. :)

I wouldn't lurk at Jacurutu if I wasn't banned there for typing a spanish phrase ("no habla espanol" IIRC correctly)breaking the rule barring non-English posting made after I typed the phrase. :'(

As far as lurking at your blog I can honestly state I only visited a couple of times the past year and got the gist you lurk at KJA's blog/myspace/facebook/twitter etc and comment on it.

(Oh, and btw, in the Duniverse, Chakobsa only bears a surface similarity to Serbian or Slovenian or Romany in a few utterances. At a meta-level, of course, FH just took some words & sentences from a few language text[book]s and applied his own meanings to them.)

Edit: The relevance of that last is I'll be adding a page on Chakobsa soon, too. :)

When FH lived in mexico he also picked up some spanish lingo such as Kulon.  :P

[SandChigger]

Culon, you mean, "fat ass" in Spanish? ::)

Evidently your memory is as bad as your English. ("got the gist"? And it's not lurking if it's not hidden.)

Anyway, what do you expect KJA & the idiots at the HLP to announce about the last two Heroes books? Or, why do you think they're delaying the announcement? Maybe some disagreement and in-fighting? Are the Perfect Writing Partners finally having a REAL argument? Someone else in the HLP opposing it? Is Brian not backing down and "apologizing" this time? Byron seems to be in the loop for a change (and he's always the last one to know anything), so that kind of implies that everybody in the HLP is involved in something going on.

Either way, they're going to look INCREDIBLY STUPID canceling or delaying one series HALFWAY THROUGH, just so they can start up another! :D (Just like they looked stupid when the publisher made them change the title last year. Just like KJA had no idea they were ditching the Youll cover illustration in favor of the UK one. Clueless buffoons in a SAD comedy of errors!)

And however it turns out, it's still a win-win situation for US. (You do realize that, yes?) The fact that the publisher is making them drop the Heroes and start over is an ADMISSION that PoD & WoD were FAILURES, both commercially and critically. AS WE HAVE BEEN SAYING. And the "Legends" books were crap and the "Great Stools" are going to continue the same plot lines, so how can they NOT be crap building on crap? KJA will just dig himself deeper down into the McDune latrine pit he has made and filled over this past decade! ;D

And on the off chance that this is all just smoke screen and they do go on with Throne & Leto... IT'LL BE THE SAME THING! KJA will have to keep trying to top Frank Herbert and top himself as well, adding ever more imbecilic shit, whatever FOOL notion pops into his bald head. (Or he steals from some other author or whatever DVD he's watching while editing his latest dictahiking transcripts!) HE CAN'T HELP HIMSELF! Throne with Shaddam's clone-ghola army and Paul becoming The Preacher at Jacurutu will just grease the slide down into a truly pathetic display of how shallow KJA and his understanding of Dune is in Leto.

I TELL YOU: I CANNOT WAIT! ;D