The Chicken

[Taqwa11]

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

>

>GEORGE W. BUSH

>We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know

>if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either

>with

>us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.

>

>AL GORE

>I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken

>crossing the road represented the application of these two different

>functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater

>services to the American people.

>

>RALPH NADER

>The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been

>polluted by unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the

>unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was crushed by

>the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.

>

>PAT BUCHANAN

>To steal a job from a decent, hardworking American.

>

>RUSH LIMBAUGH

>I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was

>getting a government grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out

>there

>is already forming a support group to help chickens with

>crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can

>real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax

>dollars, and when I say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money

>the

>government took from you to build roads for chickens to cross.

>

>MARTHA STEWART

>No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a

>standing order at the farmer's market to sell my eggs when the price

>dropped

>to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider

>information.

>

>JERRY FALWELL

>Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the

>plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other

>side." That's what they call it -- the other side. Yes, my friends, that

>chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I

>say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the

>liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other

>side."

>

>DR. SEUSS

>Did the chicken cross the road?

>Did he cross it with a toad?

>Yes, The chicken crossed the road,

>But why it crossed, I've not been told!

>

>ERNEST HEMINGWAY

>To die. In the rain. Alone.

>

>MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.

>I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads

>without having their motives called into question.

>

>GRANDPA

>In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us

>that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

>

>BARBARA WALTERS

>Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the

>chicken tell, for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it

>experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its

>life-long dream of crossing the road.

>

>JOHN LENNON

>Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.

>

>ARISTOTLE

>It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

>

>KARL MARX

>It was a historical inevitability.

>

>SADDAM HUSSEIN

>This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in

>dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

>

>VOLTAIRE

>I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the

>death its right to do it.

>

>RONALD REAGAN

>What chicken?

>

>CAPTAIN KIRK

>To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

>

>FOX MULDER

>You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens have

>to

>cross before you believe it?

>

>SIGMUND FREUD

>The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the

>road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

>

>BILL GATES

>I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads, but

>will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook --

>and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.

>

>ALBERT EINSTEIN

>Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the

>chicken?

>

>BILL CLINTON

>I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by

>chicken? Could you define chicken, please?

>

>THE BIBLE

>And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou

>shalt cross the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much

>rejoicing.

>

>COLONEL SANDERS

>I missed one?

:)

[Gunseng_Harkonnen]

Bill Clinton is defending himself hehe.

Poor chicken anyway, in Germany it would be killed becouse it doesn`t cross the road in wright way 8)